I think I have probably taken every “Which Buffy Character Are You?” quiz on the internet, only to get the same three results over and over again. My penchant for taking useless quizzes spilled over into my planning for this month of Buffy content, and I decided I needed to know which Scoobies I was dealing with on the Squad. I sent them a quiz to take, and I have collected their results for you to peruse — but first, I wanted to share my predictions for the whole Squad. Not everyone was able to take the quiz, but I had to jot down my observations. I want these predictions to be taken with a grain of salt, and I urge the Squad not to forget that I simply adore all of these characters so everything I am about to write is meant to be taken as a compliment.
My prediction for Maude: Giles
While I can’t argue with Maude’s actual results, I do still think she fits the overall Watcher vibe. She observes us with a watchful eye and swoops in with the occasional hearty dose of advice and more than enough sassy jokes to qualify as our Giles. And like Giles, Maudie has pipes. Girl can sing!
My prediction for AJ: Buffy
This was a natural choice: Lane is my leader and protector. She guides me daily and her fiery protective side is my favourite thing about her. Her loyalty and bravery match that of Miss Summers. Don’t let that angelic voice deceive you: this woman is an amazon and will ruin your world if you cross her. Alternatively, if you love and support her, she will give you an endless supply of friendship in the form of perfect GIF responses and food-based nicknames.
My prediction for Brad: Spike
Little-known fact about Brad: he is a massive smart-ass. I’ll let the shock wear off before I continue my assessment. No, but seriously folks, Brad is good guy and does what he can to help his friends, but he always add his two cents, and it’s usually dripping with good humour and is always, always sassy. He might not live off blood but the boy is still a savage. Plus, I hear he has a soft spot for Buffy.
My prediction for Kaz: Xander
Outstanding sense of humour? Check! Phenomenal friend? Check! The occasional inappropriate comment laced with good intention? Check! Yeah, this was actually a no-brainer , but I took some time to think it over because I felt a little odd about comparing my best friend to the character I have long referred to as my ideal boyfriend. It makes perfect sense though; she is the most supportive human I have ever met and if anyone on the Squad could derail an apocalypse with a speech about love, it’s our Kaz.
My prediction for Alana: Anya
I had the pleasure of meeting Alana in person last year at Pax Aus, and the biggest take-away from our time together was, “Dang, this girl is funny as hell.” I long suspected that we had a similar sense of humour, but drinking and frolicking through Melbourne with her confirmed my suspicions. Aside from the killer sense of humour, Alana is pretty no-nonsense, much like the former vengeance demon.
My prediction for Neek: Faith
Em is an absolute sweetheart. She has a heart of gold and she is oodles of fun, but underneath all that she has a hilariously dark side that comes out most notably in Geek Bomb streams. Faith is kind of the opposite, but the vibe is still the same: there is more to these babes than meets the eye.
My prediction for Maddie: Cordelia
I am cheating a little bit with this one because technically Maddie reminds me of Angel-era Cordy. Maddie goes through life very much like Miss Chase, with all the poise, charm and beauty often attributed to the character. However, all that is almost incidental, because the main reason I associate these two is their devotion to helping others. Maddie is a champion for the people in her real life and while healing folks in Overwatch. Plus, that girl knows how to put a dang outfit together.
My prediction for Matt: Jonathan
Jonathan is a fan favourite for a reason. His kind but geeky nature endeared him to the masses. Sure, he was short and did take a bit of turn to the dark side, but he always had a good heart and is without a doubt the reason I associate him with our Tilbo. Matt is kind of like little brother to me; he’s fun to joke around with and we have a mutual respect that reflects in our conversations about everything from life to The Simpsons.
My prediction for Ryan: Oz
Ry is clever as hell, and everything he says can be filed under two categories: hilarious or supportive and kind. That is why my prediction for him was Oz, Sunnydale’s favourite musician/werewolf, and while he is a man of few words, the words that do escape fall into the same categories as Ryan’s words of wisdom.
My prediction for Justine: Dawn
I don’t mean season five or even season six Dawn; this is strictly badass season seven Dawn I am referring to. Justine is a little firecracker and she has an excellent sense of self, like the post-“Potential” Dawn after Xander gives her that killer speech.When Teenie sets her mind to something, she kicks its butt with sheer determination, not unlike the former mystic ball of energy.
My prediction for Julia: Willow
Julia has a particular way of speaking that is hilarious and adorable, and it reminded me of Willow right from our first day on the Squad. The phrases and words she uses, especially when she is fired up sound like Joss himself crafted them. That is just a small part of this comparison though, as Julia is basically Willow IRL minus the magic. She is a complete angel with a wonderful heart and a fiercely protective nature that is so similar to the plucky witch, it’s kind of bananas.
My prediction for Mickey: Tara
Too easy. I have known this one forever as Mickey is the heart of Geek Bomb, just like Tara for the Scoobies became over time. Mickey has the biggest heart of anyone I’ve met, and she doles out her friendship in warm bundles of love and support that feel like, dare I say, magic. Tara was a supportive and loving character, and though she often felt like an outsider, the Scoobies relied on her for a number of reasons.
My prediction for Shona: Angel
Angel and Shona are both tall, dark and mysterious, but with great focus on helping others and being kind. Angel is well-read as well as brave and passionate, which are definitely traits I associated with our resident Zelda expert.
And now for the Squad’s actual results!
Prediction: I’ve got my fingers crossed for Willow, because she’s a tough cookie that has a soft and gooey center, and I fancy myself that kind of gal. But I wouldn’t be totally surprised if I get thrown a wacky curveball and end up being Spike. (I could pull off the platinum blonde hair, yeah?)
Result: I AM THE BUFF-STER. Honestly, I’m a little caught off guard. I adore Buffy, but don’t think I’ve got what it takes to be the headstrong protagonist that has meant so much to so many people. With the exception of Hermione Granger and Peggy Olson, I’ve always seen myself more as the “sidekick” or the female character who’s best friends with the lead, but maybe that’s more to do with the way I see myself than with how my personality translates into television tropes. I’m flattered to be Buffy!
Prediction: I’m not sure! I’ve only seen a few episodes, and I don’t really remember many characters outside of the main cast. I’ll say Buffy, because she’s pretty kick ass and I liked her character.
Result: Buffy SummersI’m pretty happy with this result! I admire strong women, and Buffy has long been held up as an example of a strong, female character.
Prediction: Ceilidh gave me Xander, and I guess he’s a pretty funny guy so I’m happy with that.
Result: Anya Jenkins. Well, she’s definitely got fire. I don’t know how I feel about being someone whose whole character centres around “vengeance,” but at least she can hold her own?
Prediction: I thought I’d get Spike cause I suck.
Result: I got Faith because I’m sexy.
Reaction: I’m OK with being a strong female.
Prediction: I was hoping I’d get Willow, mostly as she seems to be a quiet but attentive friend.
Result: I ended up getting Anya Jenkins. This just seems weird to me, given that I don’t really fit into her demeanour that well. I get that she’s devoted her life to revenge, but it only seems like the honesty part that resonates with me. An unusual choice, for sure.
Prediction: Buffy or Xander. Really depends on my mood. Kinda like when I was a little kid and my brothers chose to be Raphael and Donatello… I was left to either be Leonardo or Michelangelo. Leo was the leader who kept his calm and made the right decisions, whereas Mich was the party boy who was the comic relief of the group and learned to chill the best. This has been a choice applied to me daily for decades.
Result: Buffy. Boss bitch pants are firmly on! Happy to have this, I see it as incredibly fitting. Worth noting the quiz DID ask for my hair colour, and there were no male options, so even if it’s by default, I don’t think there’s a miss-stake here.
Full disclosure that I’m not a big Buffy fan. I’ve only seen a handful of episodes. I was predicting to get someone nerdy like Giles or Xander, but ended up with Dawn, who I think is the annoying younger sister? Lame. I would have preferred to have been Angel, to be honest. Only because he’s the only other character I really know.
Faith Lehane 🤷🏻♂️
Prediction: I want to say Faith, but I’ll totally get Willow; I was as nerdy as her during high school, and sometimes my fashion sense was just as questionable.
Result: Faith. Faith is hands down my favourite character! I love her story arc and her attitude towards being a Slayer. Plus, she rocks leather pants on a whole new level.
As a fan of Buffy, I have to admit that I loved Faith Lehane. She is the combination of “beauty, power and death” (as stated by Andrew Wells). Every since she was little, she has wanted a dog, as it would give her something to love. I have grown up with dogs; they are a huge part of my life and I have loved and still love them all.
When Lehane first moved to Sunnydale, she felt alienated by the Scooby Gang and that regardless of what she did, she rarely got the credit. Personally, while I was accepted by my peers, I was never truly close with anyone. I did have a stigma attached: I was a “teacher’s pet/nerd.” Call me a nerd now and I couldn’t care less, but back then, I was oblivious to what being a nerd meant. I loved helping out and spent most of my free time doing extra-curricular work and the majority of the time, I was not rewarded for it. Unlike Faith here, I didn’t mind too much. I have come to learn that you do things in life because you want to. It is an experience for you, and that is all that matters. We both have trust issues, love to wear black and have a carefree attitude towards violence (mine being violence in video games and TV/films, that is it). But I’ll probably get Buffy; most people tell me I’m more like Buffy. Which I can understand why, I’m visually similar and do have similarities, like trying to fit in and be normal regardless of what I really am, Buffy being a Slayer and me being a “neek.” But we both came to accept who we were.
Result: I got Buffy; kind of that that would be the case. I guess, when you think of it, Faith is basically a mirror image of Buffy. Well, a representation of what Buffy would have been like if her life was different. Faith was raised by abusive and neglectful parents and suffered from various issues, while Buffy grew up in a loving home surrounded by caring friends and family. So while I do share similarities with Faith, I had a wonderful upbringing. Plus, if I had to predict who I would be other than Faith, it would have been Buffy. Overall, I’m five by five.
Prediction: I always get Faith, Xander or Anya, so I assumed that would be my result again.
Result: I got Faith again and that is just fine by me. I genuinely think I am a perfect blend of Xander and Faith. I relate to all the characters on one level or another, so I find I am rarely disappointed in the results. That being said, if I ever get Riley as a result, I will likely burn my computer in a dumpster fire and then disappear forever.
Which character are you? Let us know by tweeting at me (@Andraste) or the whole Squad (@GeekBomb)!